Troubled Reverie

Darkness loomed as the rain thundered against the small roof of the store he happened to be in. He hardly cared though as he lifted the bottle to his lips and emptied it. Soon, he will be free of a lingering disease called emptiness. The 'Red Horse Solution' indeed is handy. It's after-effect is beginning to commence.
Paying his due, he briskly ran towards his car. Half-staggering, he managed to get in and start it.
Feeling light-headed, he felt the hurt dissipating. With the hurt almost gone, it was too easy to imagine her sitting right next to him. Too easy to dream. Yet he knew it is not. A girl's silhouette materialized at the corner of his mind.
"Why can't I be over you?" he said, half to himself and half to the girl next him.
The girl smiled sadly.
"You're so selfish, you know that? You could've at least told me, but then.." he said, shrugging.
The girl shook her head.
"None of your excuses this time. None of those tiresome speeches." he said smiling.
The girl smiled.
She's always the defensive one, arguing endlessly about their responsibilities for the just cause of mankind. An idealist. Like him. Their ideals almost always causes them trouble. How they always managed to get through, they have no idea, but the last one cost them very dearly.
"I can still remember our first encounter, your haughty demeanor and your airs." he laughed.
The girl returned a frown.
"There you go again." he laughed.
This time, the girl smiled.
"The editor asked me to stop 'leisuring'," he laughed,"but of course, he doesn't know.." he stopped laughing and frowned.
The girl smiled.
His weakness to alcohol drinking is a known fact to all of his close friends. He would end up vomiting and losing his self control after a few bottles. That is the easy part, for his hangovers are the worst of it. And not to say of his rashes.
But then he told her his true feelings after she beat him in a drinking match. He was sick for a week and has to endure rashes for a month. It's all worth it though, for she took care of him the whole week he's sick.
"Yes, of course I remember, how could I forget that night, must've been embarrassing for you to have me shouting how much I love you at that bar in front of all that people." he said .
The girl shook her head lightly then smiled.
How could he forget, until now, he's been avoiding that place.
"You know what? I'm almost finished with our love story, anyway, the white dress you're now wearing isn't like you at all, a touch of black would make that more like you. I missed wearing our uniform." he said.
The girl smiled.
She likes black and white, like him. Their 'uniforms' are two identical tees that they wear whenever they feel like it.
"Do you think I should let it be published? Some of our more private secrets are there." he winked at her.
The girl nodded.
Entering the expressway, he is unconscious that he's gathering speed. 60-80-100..
"You know what, my life is a bore without you. No one to argue with, no one to fuss with. And no, she can't replace you." he sighed.
The girl shook her head.
"I'm tired." he murmured. I miss you, he could've said.
Each day has been a tasteless gruel for him, a torture to endure, and then sweet, temporary relief at night. It's been always like this since the day..
He knew what would happen next, he would end up in his room, drunk but not nauseating. She would sleep in his bed with him, wrapped in his arms, she would be in his dreams too. His dreams are often short glimpses of the times they were together. Then he would wake up, and she's gone. Another day of boring routine.
And then his goddamned work.
His workmates. Friends.
They will make fun of him, asking him between outbursts to go to a psychiatrist and seek help.
They did not believe in him.
Just a dream.. Extreme depression.. Alcohol.. Drugs?
"What do you think I should do?" he asked.
Tears flow from her eyes.
"Please don't cry, I can't stand you crying, you know that." he said, trying to comfort her.
Despite of her tears, she smiled.
Her tears had been always his weakpoint. Fierce arguments would often end with him consenting to her wishes. But then the last time she cried still haunts him until now.
A fitting remembrance for an ending tale.
"Why did you do that? How could you not tell me!?" he asked furiously.
Her hand found his. He shook off her hand.
"I might have joined you, we could have both.." was all he could say.
He swallowed a lump building in his throat. This is madness. A world without her. A cold world devoid of the girl that keeps him alive.
"Those bastards. They will all go to hell! The police said it is impossible to find out because there were no witnesses." he laughed, hysterically. The girl only shook her head.
"We should've faced them together!" he bellowed, as streams of tears flow from his eyes.
The girl squeezed his hand.
He should've known that their lives were both in danger when they started to write stinging articles about the fraud that happened during the recent election. The vast resources of the party that won ensured that they will always find a plethora of death threats from their workplace to their houses. The last one though is different.
"Instead you faced them alone a-and.. That phone call.. Y-you lied.." he stopped, he could not go on.
He could not, for the life of him forget the phone call that turned out to be their last conversation.
'hi, are you busy?' she asked, her tone losing her usual good natured mood.
'usually, but not to someone as pretty as you.' he said, trying to ease her.
She laughed, a forced and shaky one.
'come on, what's the problem?' he asked uneasily.
'oh, nothing, I just want you to know how, how m- much I-I love you,' she stopped and he could hear her nearing tears.
'I love you too, you're at the office? Let's talk about it,' he said, worryingly.
'no, no, I'm fine, I, uhm, I'll miss you.' she said' finally breaking into tears.
'what are you talking about, are you leaving?' he asked panicking.
'in a manner, yes' she laughed despite her tears.
'please don't do this, is this a joke? It's not funny.'
She laughed, 'of course it is a joke, silly, I love you.'
'God, you'll have me worried sick! I love you too.' he sighed, but then he felt that something isn't right.
'goodbye, I love you. I always will.'
'I love you too, see you later.' he would swear to God he heard her sobbing.
Minutes later, she's on the news.
He watched the news with his heart breaking.
"Why?" was all he could ask.
The girl said nothing as tears flow from her eyes like rain drops.
He could imagine her crying while driving her car as it was chased by her assailants.
He could hear her silent whimpers.
He could smell the perfume he gave her that she's fond of using.
He could see the pursuing cars through the rear mirror.
He could taste the saltiness of her tears as it coursed through her lips.
He could feel her fear as she bid him her last goodbye 'til she hung-up, and with it, her love.
"We're together now, death will not separate us again. I can no longer endure waking up every morning without you by my side." he said as he gripped the steering wheel.
Her hand tried to stop him.
She couldn't.
Both of her hands tried.
He couldn't.
Her eyes met his, "I won't let them take you away from me again!"
With grim resolve, he floored his car.
'Don't do this' her voice rang in his mind.
"There's nothing else left for me to do."
'So much about your pride, why are you running away from this? Start again.'
"Pride eh? It died the day I met you. There are no more fresh starts, it all ended when death took you away!"
'Find another, you won't be alone for long.'
"Later, 'you won't be alone'."
'Don't throw your life away, please.'
"You're my life, there is no more 'life' left for me."
'Don't be stubborn, if you really love me you will go on with your life.'
"If you really love me, you will support me with this, please? Free me from this torture."
'Please..'
"Hey there, I will hear no more useless rhetoric from you, young lady. I'm doing this not only for you but for myself as well, so don't you dare make my love for you as leverage. Are you with me?"
'You're so stubborn, you know that.'
"Oh, but that's our shared trait. For the record you're much more stubborn than me."
She sighed and later on smiled.
He smiled.
"You know what, I would trade the whole world for that smile."
She relaxed her hold of his hand and gently squeezed it.
He let go of the steering wheel and looked at her.
And yes, she's still the most beautiful girl in the world.
His heart missed a beat as he looked at her eyes. He once remarked those eyes could replace the stars in the sky.
And they still could.
A large truck loomed, not very far from his car, it's moving towards his direction.
He didn't care, as he was lost in her lovely eyes. Everything is of secondary importance now that he got her back.
"I love you."
'I love you, too.'
Redemption is at hand.
He's free.
They're free.
A bewildered truck driver.
The blinding lights.
The loud horns from everywhere.
The screeching tires.
His heart pounding just like the first time their eyes met.
The last thing he felt was the softness of her lips as he fall into oblivion..